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Back to the Real World

It’s been over 30 days since my last post.  Why?  Well it was inevitable but I had to return to the “real world.”  After basking in the daily glow of my little one’s smile for five months, watching him grow before my eyes, reaching the baby milestones that for so many years I had longed to experience, well all this came to an abrupt end last week when it was time for me to return to work.

Now I have to leave what I believe has been the most ideal and perfect world to instead return to my job.   I sound so thrilled, right?  Don’t get me wrong, given the unemployment rate, I do realize that I’m very fortunate to have a job.  Everyone told me how difficult it would be and I was in denial for quite some time that this day would even come, after all I feel like it was just yesterday that I brought him home for the very first time.  I would be lying to you if I said it has been great actually interacting with adults rather than watching the baby channel on TV all day whose jingles have left a permanent imprint in my head; so much so that I recall the words to the children’s songs more than my favorite songs on the radio.  But isn’t that what becoming a parent is all about?  Happy feelings EVERY day, a fantasy world in which every day is a great day and there is no sadness; drama, or any people who go out of their way to be mean and vindictive?  What a dream! 

I can’t begin to express how difficult it is to wake up each morning knowing that instead of being home to witness the changes, growth, and additional milestones that my son will begin to reach only to instead have to go to work.  It’s all worth it though when I see that adorable little smile when I pick him up from daycare, it  just melts and warms my heart.  I hope he will some day understand that despite Mommy not wanting to leave him, I had to do it so that he would be open to a world of opportunity and endless learning experiences because both Daddy and Mommy work so hard every day so that he will have a thriving and fruitful future.

I’m ever so greatful and thankful that I have found the greatest support system in a daycare and a newfound adopted grandmother; both whom take such wonderful care of my son and have made my transition back to work much easier. 

We will return to the regularly scheduled programming of great baby style and awesome fashion finds soon, so please stay tuned and continue to follow Babynistadiaries.

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